I Bought a Temu Sex Toy

Temu Onahole Review

At a Glance

+ Affordable pricing

+ Quick shipping

- Channels don’t feel distinct

- Ass is an afterthought

- Channel entrances get caught when in use

With Temu having seemingly taken over Wish.com as the comparatively new sketchy online bargain retailer, I’m sure some men have been wondering what sort of things they have in the masturbator sex toy category. With sites like these having notorious reputations for fake reviews and scam content, let me tell you my experience trying out a Temu sex toy.

When browsing through the site, I found a lot of interesting information. There is actually way more selection and variety on Temu than on Wish. That being said, a lot of products on Temu – especially full body shaped masturbators – are the same thing with different descriptions. Often for these, they will dress them up in very small lingerie and pose them in miniature sets to make them look life-sized. “Oh wow, look, a sex doll for $20!” Well, yes, but actually no. Scrolling through the product images, you can see that the measurements are only ever a few inches – and sometimes a full third of that measurement is thigh/leg, so that’s even further misleading for someone who actually checks measurements assuming that the number in the description is the canal depth.

Not wanting to be left with a flimsy limb-flailing torso-resembling thing stretching over half of me, I opted for one of the larger non-anatomical models that caught my eye. How non-anatomical? How about five whole damn channels in the canal, baby!? Well, it’s four plus the ass, unless you’re counting that little nubbin channel. Let me introduce you to the 1pc Angel Doll Male Masturbator Vaginal & Anal 1200g TPE Material Adult Supplies For Male. Yes, that’s the full product name.

What was the practical purpose for something with this many places to stick your dick from one opening? I have no idea. I mean, I guess if you have a couple of guys who both want to use a toy at the same time, but they’re scared of having their members touch? No idea. Anyway, the package arrived fairly quickly. I was expecting a long wait, but I think it was only four days. The white box on the image was inside of a discrete brown box, so no worries there.

The toy itself feels pretty nice on the outside. It’s pretty comparable to some denser hip toys out there. There isn’t much flop to it; there is a lot going on inside, so that isn’t surprising. The exterior shape is pretty nice for what it is. There is a vague anatomical sense to it with some hip wings and a nice little booty. But for me, that’s where the positives end.

So, the multiple channels: how do they feel? I mean, alright, I guess. They get the job done. If you’re expecting a different texture and tightness with each channel being a new adventure, then you’re going to be let down. The interior lining is too soft to really make an impact with the bumps and ribbed textures. Although the anthill-like maze of channels looks like a dramatic dungeon crawl for your dick, it’s a lot of work to find a “non-default” channel with not really any payoff in terms of feel.

If I were to design a toy like this with multiple channels, I would want each one to have a different feel through size, material, texture, and shape. Otherwise, what’s the point?

With this, it may seem like a pretty good bargain for an average masturbator. Unfortunately, there is an issue that comes up when in use. If you push in after pulling out past the other channel entrances, your tip may get caught on the lip of one of the entrances on your way back in. It doesn’t hurt or anything, but it doesn’t feel pleasurable. It’s kind of disappointing that what could have been a fun toy turns out to be a mood-killer when in use for what it’s intended purpose at a moderate speed.

Lastly, I want to touch on the ass. It’s there. The entrance is really small; unfortunately, the material there is really tight and prone to tearing, so it isn’t really tight like you might want an asshole toy. The rest of the canal is looser than all other options on this toy. Also, it goes left. Like, the actual canal curves left. I mean, a lot of us curve one way or another, right? But it’s a weird decision to put in a sex toy. Because it doesn’t add to the experience, I’m going to say it detracts from it.

So, is this masturbator worth it? Not really. At a price point of between $25-$40 depending on when you order, discounts, and shipping, there are higher-quality experiences to find out there. How about Temu sex toys in general? If you are new to masturbators, find a more reputable retailer with better options. Did you find one that looks like a whole lot like Bad Dragon’s Hazel and think you found a great deal? Do yourself a favor and just save up for the cool red and black logo; Temu’s is a quarter of the price for a reason. If you consider yourself a fuck toy aficionado and are just curious about what’s out there, then it might be a few bucks to sate some curiosity. But your mind won’t be blown.